“If I was going to kiss a girl, and I wouldn’t rule it out, it definitely wouldn’t be her.” I’d told the guys when they questioned me over it. I was pleased that she was leaving, but wondered why on earth Phillip would go with her. Surely he had some sort of standards. I assumed he was just keeping his numbers up.
“Oh, hey.” He said surprised to see me and a little embarrassed. “I thought you’d left. I’m just dropping Tania to the train station and I’ll be back.”
“Okay, I’ll see you soon, then.”
He gave me a suggestive look and walked away. I went upstairs and my friends were exactly where I’d left them.
“Alice!” Scott called out to me from a few meters away, “You came back.”
“I told you I would.”
“Let’s get you a drink.” He said, walking me to the bar. “How was your friend?”
“Oh Scott, he is a raging dickhead.” And he really was.
“I think you’ll be safe from Phillip now, he took that Tania girl home with him.”
“He didn’t take her home, he just went to drop her to the train station; I saw them on my way in. He said he’d be back.”
“He’s keen on you, Alice, you’ve gotta watch out for him, he’s got a reputation.”
“Ahh yes, I’ve heard of this reputation. He likes to think of himself as an ‘opportunist’. Personally, I think the common ‘man whore’ terminology is more appropriate.
Scott and I joined the rest of the group, who were in the middle of a discussion about whether or not a guy at work the week before had ‘fake fainted’, or whether it had been the real deal.
“Definitely fake” I chimed in.
“Ok, Alice’s pro fake as well.” Ben said. “Tell us your reasons.” I giggled, this had turned into a serious discussion evidently, and they wanted to get to the bottom of it.
“Okay, to start we’ve heard the reports from his school friends that he is a classic fake fainter from way back. What I think is if he really fainted, he would have fallen different and hit his head on the way down, probably. He supported his fall, that’s why his arms ended up where they did. Also, it didn’t sound heavy enough. Plus, when we talked to him after, he attempted to sound worse than he actually was. He milked it too much for it to be genuine or believable. If it were real, there would have been no reason for him to do that. Then, he adds a bit of drama by being wobbly on his feet and he’s all “I’ll get my Dad to pick me up.” In his fake pained voice to match his fake faint. You’re 27 years old, dude; be a man! That was beside the point, I knew, but I really didn’t like the guy.
I heard a laugh coming from behind me and turned around to see Phillip. “And Alice didn’t even check if he was ok.” He told everyone, reiterating my dislike for him further still. “She just hears the thud on the ground, peeks over her shoulder and when she sees him on the floor, tries to contain her laughter and turns back around to continue working.”
“That’s because it was fake!”
They laughed “But you didn’t know it was fake.”
“Oh, but I did. And besides, Dr. James had it all under control, checking his eyes and shit like he’s some sort of medical professional. You’re a salesman, James!”
After a few more opinions and perspectives on the fake fainting incident we were ready to go our separate ways. My car was in the city under the hotel my sister used to work at and from where she had stolen a free parking pass. I wasn’t planning on drinking, but Phillip had offered me his couch which I accepted with the stipulation that it would, in fact, be the couch I was staying on and not in his bed. Another stipulation was that he would not attempt to convince me to stay in his bed.
I knew his intentions were not pure, but decided to drink anyway. I was stronger than he was convincing and besides, I didn’t even like the guy. I had spent the past two years at work intentionally ignoring him. He’d smile at me and I would glance at him dismissively and look the other way. It was rude, I knew, but his reputation preceded him; he didn’t need any encouragement. He had moved into my department recently, though, and slowly I began to treat him like a normal person, and even enjoyed his company on occasion.
I had a feeling that because of my reservation, he’d seen me as a challenge. If it were a challenge, I would definitely come out on top. He didn’t know that, though. To him; I was the innocent and naive girl he saw at work; the façade was an intentional diversion. The boys had their role to play, and I had mine; to build up their egos and treat them like Gods, to ask questions I already knew the answers to and to mask the fact that I was confident and capable, especially in the art of manipulation and brainwashing.
If knew that if they knew me, really knew me; there would be daily interrogations about my love life, conquests and frivolity. Still, I had started to look at Phillip suggestively, I couldn’t help it. He was just too cute, trying to impress with his constant bad jokes and semi-intelligent conversation. He would be my play thing, and it was going to be fun.
He lived close by and we decided to walk. As we did, I moved close to him, brushing my hand against his leg as if by accident.
“You just touched my leg.” He said, insinuating that there was a suggestive connotation behind it, which there was.
“What of it?” I moved away.
“That’s hot.” I wasn’t sure if he was referring to the leg brushing, my dismissive comment or my brazen attitude. I didn’t care. He stopped walking so I did, too. He turned to face me and moved a step closer. I faced him and copied, stepping a little closer. We came face to face. Close enough that I could smell him; he smelled good, the only thing about him that I liked. I could see why girls liked Phillip. He was tall and quite attractive. He looked young for his age. His face was soft and warm. Still, he did nothing for me and his push over attitude only strengthened my indifference.
“Do it. That’s what you want, isn’t it, why you asked me to stay over?”
“You know I want to” he managed.
“Why are you hesitating, then?”
“Because I don’t know if you want me to.”
“Hmmm, that is a problem” I breathed him in; obviously. I moved closer, my lips brushing his ear and whispered “It’s not attractive; faltering, needing confirmation instead of just taking the fucking risk. It’s weak. I don’t like weak.” I pushed him away and started walking. I was almost at the T intersection where I would need his help in knowing where to go. There was a bus stop on the side of the road. I sat down and waited for him.
In the 30 seconds we were apart, his attitude had shifted, he bent over me and pushed my legs apart so he could stand between them, grabbed my hair from behind and pulled it, hard, moving my chin up in one smooth motion so he could kiss me easily. He leant down and picked me up effortlessly, his arms enveloping my legs. He took me to the back of the bus stop where I wrapped my legs around him tight, intent on staying there. I looked down at his face. “See, isn’t that better?” I asked him rhetorically, innocently.
I placed one hand firm over his eyes so he couldn’t see me, his head hit the bus stop and I hoped it hurt. My other hand came up to play with his lips; they were wet and I ran my finger along them, lingering where his bottom lip turned into his mouth. I put my mouth close to his, breathing deep; feigning want. I waited. His tongue met my finger and my tongue touched his. He tasted as good as he smelt. I bit down on his bottom lip.
It didn’t take long; he took over, placing me on my feet and pushing me against the brick of the bus stop, his body hard against mine. He was being rough and careless with me and I liked it. I reached up to his hair, pulling it hard and pushing his head up so I could taste the skin on his neck. My lips came to rest just under his jaw near his chin. I kissed his skin gently, moving slowly down towards his neck. I stopped in the softest spot I could find and kissed, wet and soft, and then harder. He let slip a sigh. I didn’t stop; my mouth moved to his ear and whispered words that didn’t have meaning. My hands were ravaging him, in his hair, gripping his arms, around his neck. I slid one hand down the front of his body slowly, lingering, and then back up. His head tilted back uncontrolled and presumably abandoned for thought.
“Left or right?” I asked him, pushing away and turning to face the direction of his house.
“What?” He struggled to concentrate.
“How do we get to your house, Phillip?”
“Oh, you’ve got to turn left here.”
As we walked I kept my distance. “That was hot.” He repeated the same line from earlier; could he not come up with something at least a little creative? This guy was just intent on disappointing.
“So, what was that, just then?”
“I thought it was pretty self-explanatory.”
“No, I mean, yes but are we going to do it again, because I’d really like to do that again.” I’m sure you would, but sadly, no.
“Consider it a once off thing.” A taste, if you will.
“It doesn’t have to be.”
“Yes. It does have to be.”
“Why?” Err, let me think; because you are a push over weak jerk in a mediocre job with a mediocre life that can’t challenge me or excite me. Because you worship me but you don’t respect me, because I don’t actually like you as a person. I don’t like your personality or the way you look at me, I don’t like your face or your stupid fancy clothes or your opinions. But mostly it’s because you’re not Owen.
“I’ve warned you about me before, Phillip. I’ve told what I’m like. I lead guys on and I manipulate them into getting exactly what I want. It’s what I do. You seem to think that I’m not capable of such a thing, but I’m telling you again, now, that I am, and that it will happen to you, too. You will hate me after, that much is certain. But you know what else, and this part is really great, you will end up hating yourself, too, because I warned you it would happen, and you went ahead and did it anyway.”
He gave me a disbelieving look. What an easy target he was.
As we turned onto his street, I recognised it slightly. “I’ve been here before.” I whispered to myself. We kept walking and as we did, a sinking feeling came over me. Oh, shit. “How far up do you live?”
“Just up here, slightly around the bend on the left.”
This was the street Owen lived on. Specifically, Owen lived just up around the bend on the left. I hoped it wasn’t the same complex and was relieved when we walked past Owen’s house and into the apartments next door.
“My room is upstairs.” He looked at me suggestively. I sat down on the couch.
“I’m sleeping here, Phillip.”
“My bed is comfortable and the couch is not. My bed is also big, huge; you won’t even notice I’m all the way over the other side.”
I ignored him. “Thanks for letting me stay here.”
“You’re welcome.” He surrendered, like I knew he would, and got me a pillow and blanket. I was relieved that that was the end of it. It was a tease, I knew, but wasn’t that the point?
“Thanks again, Phillip. Goodnight.”
“I had fun with you tonight. You know I’m going to pursue you, right?” Great; that’s just what I needed.
“Goodnight, Phillip”
Worn out, I turned on my side and let my thoughts flicker to Owen. What are the chances, seriously, of his house being right next door? And why wasn’t his car there? Where was he? Who was he with? I wished I was there instead of where I was. I thought of the one night I had spent at Owen’s house. “Don’t you fall asleep” he’d said to me “I’ve got plans for you”. He was adorable. I missed him. Questions circled around my head and I replayed our brief moments together over and over until I fell asleep.
I woke up early the next morning and called a taxi while Phillip was still asleep. Owen’s car was there, so I walked in the opposite direction where he would have no chance of seeing me.
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